Why?? Why do I allow this?? I really don't know. Maybe because I like to hear them laughing together or maybe because five, STARVING people against one mama is quite terrifying. :)
2.21.2013
Large Family Woes?? - 2
Lunch time is quite scary in my home at times with five, growing, young people all in search of the perfect meal. "What's for lunch, mom?", is a question that starts anywhere between 10:30 and 11:00 in the morning. Around noon, I put them all of out their misery and start offering suggestions: leftovers, sandwiches, etc. The stampede starts, the fridge is flung open, and voices call out dibs on the best. As the mob moves to the table the counters are littered with containers and empty packages. Judging from the noise coming from the table, I am pretty sure that prayers are offered fairly quickly or around a mouth full of food. As stomachs start to fill the jesting and jostling start (I am really surprised that I have not had to perform the Heimlich Maneuver yet), and food is passed from plate to plate due to over indulgence. The fact that some bellies may never be filled is made known by the shout, "Mom, is there anything else to eat....I'm STARVING!". Thankfully, as they leave the table one by one, the noise level returns to normal, the counters get cleaned up, the dishes are done, and school or play resumes.
Why?? Why do I allow this?? I really don't know. Maybe because I like to hear them laughing together or maybe because five, STARVING people against one mama is quite terrifying. :)
Why?? Why do I allow this?? I really don't know. Maybe because I like to hear them laughing together or maybe because five, STARVING people against one mama is quite terrifying. :)
1.09.2013
Run!
I envy runners. I want to be a runner. I really want to be a runner. It looks freeing, empowering. I'm not a runner. I know it's going to hurt. I'm afraid I will fail. I don't put on my running shoes (yes, I have some). I don't try, I just avoid it. If I don't try then I can't fail. Right? Wrong!
I spent a good portion of 2012 with this same attitude. I had some great thoughts about things I wanted to accomplish, books I wanted to read, scripture I wanted to study, fitness I didn't want to do but needed to do, goals I wanted to meet. I was afraid to fail, so I let these thoughts remain thoughts. Never pursuing, never running with them to see just how far I could go. I was ensnared by fear of failure.
Towards the end of 2012, I felt that God was placing some things on my heart - ideas, goals, changes that needed to take place but I was stuck. Not trying, not pursuing, not following through had become normal, comfortable for me.
Last Sunday, I was challenged to "refocus my focus" by my pastor. The message was great. God used my pastor and his message to challenge me further. My questions were answered and my direction confirmed. All neatly presented and wrapped together like a beautiful gift. What really spoke to me, what is motivating me, is God's amazing, intimate love for me. I am overwhelmed by His personal love for and interest in Me!
I do not want to just have great thoughts. I want to pursue those great thoughts with action. I'm throwing off that fear of failure. I want to run!
"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith..." ~Hebrews 12:1-2a
I spent a good portion of 2012 with this same attitude. I had some great thoughts about things I wanted to accomplish, books I wanted to read, scripture I wanted to study, fitness I didn't want to do but needed to do, goals I wanted to meet. I was afraid to fail, so I let these thoughts remain thoughts. Never pursuing, never running with them to see just how far I could go. I was ensnared by fear of failure.
Towards the end of 2012, I felt that God was placing some things on my heart - ideas, goals, changes that needed to take place but I was stuck. Not trying, not pursuing, not following through had become normal, comfortable for me.
Last Sunday, I was challenged to "refocus my focus" by my pastor. The message was great. God used my pastor and his message to challenge me further. My questions were answered and my direction confirmed. All neatly presented and wrapped together like a beautiful gift. What really spoke to me, what is motivating me, is God's amazing, intimate love for me. I am overwhelmed by His personal love for and interest in Me!
I do not want to just have great thoughts. I want to pursue those great thoughts with action. I'm throwing off that fear of failure. I want to run!
"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith..." ~Hebrews 12:1-2a
11.07.2012
Large Family Woes?? - 1
I had a humorous thing happen to me today and it gave me the idea for a little side-line blog. I thought it might be fun to write about some of the things faced by large families. Now, I am not complaining in anyway about my large family. I am not looking for sympathy. Most of what I will write I find funny and chalk it up as a "perk". I fully understand how I got a large family (believe me people have asked). I absolutely love my family and wouldn't trade it for the world even on our worst day.
Here's what happened today: I called a local dental office to set up cleanings for all five of my children. I called the appointment line. I waited patiently on the phone as the operator told me that I was the fifth caller, then third, then finally first in line. Even being first in line I still had a wait time. After about seven minutes the receptionist gets on the phone and asks how she can help me. I told her that I needed to make dental appointments for my five children. She then asks me if I would call back after 2 pm because there were only two people answering phones and they were busy answering those phone calls. Here's my thought process:
Didn't I just call you? Didn't I have to wait like everyone else? Isn't answering the phones and making appointments your job? Isn't my one phone call with five appointments equal to the next five phone calls with one appointment each?
I did tell her that I had waited my turn and I preferred not to have to call back. Thankfully, she did help me set up my appointments without making me call back.
Here's what happened today: I called a local dental office to set up cleanings for all five of my children. I called the appointment line. I waited patiently on the phone as the operator told me that I was the fifth caller, then third, then finally first in line. Even being first in line I still had a wait time. After about seven minutes the receptionist gets on the phone and asks how she can help me. I told her that I needed to make dental appointments for my five children. She then asks me if I would call back after 2 pm because there were only two people answering phones and they were busy answering those phone calls. Here's my thought process:
Didn't I just call you? Didn't I have to wait like everyone else? Isn't answering the phones and making appointments your job? Isn't my one phone call with five appointments equal to the next five phone calls with one appointment each?
I did tell her that I had waited my turn and I preferred not to have to call back. Thankfully, she did help me set up my appointments without making me call back.
9.03.2012
THE Question
Do I trust God? I'm talking about that down-deep, complete heart, second-by-second, with EVERYTHING trust.
It all started with my son and football. My son has wanted to play football FOR years. My husband and I avoided the commitment FOR years...until this year. This year, my son's freshman year, was going to be the year that we would let him experience what it would be like to play football with a local school. My son spent the summer practicing, weightlifting, and building relationships with the team. Things were going well, I was going to watch my boy play! Then we missed a deadline on the paperwork and the possibility of him playing was called into question. I was disappointed and frustrated, he felt the same. I looked over at him and asked him, "If you can't play football this year, will you trust that this is God's plan for you, that He knows best?" He met my gaze and said, "Yes". We got in the needed paperwork. He got his pads and jersey. It looked like he was going to play after all. Another issue revolving around school zoning arose. There was no way around it. He will not be playing football this year. My son handled this disappointment with such grace and maturity. He is really, truly trusting God in this situation.
The weeks following this football story, it was my turn to answer the same question I had asked my son. God was whispering in my heart, asking me if I would trust His plan for my life, not just in the big things but in the everyday things. His question came in different situations:
Michelle, will you trust Me when your son is disappointed and there is nothing you can do to fix it?
Michelle, will you trust Me when your other son is hurt badly and an ER visit is necessary? Will you trust me to protect what is so valuable to you?
Michelle, will you trust Me when you have an extra wait time that cuts in to your schedule? Will you be joyful and at peace?
Michelle, will you trust Me when your day and plans are interrupted because one of your children has lice and your dryer breaks?
Michelle, will you trust Me when your equipment for your business is broken and customers are waiting? Will you trust that I alone am able to supply all your needs?
Michelle, will you trust Me in EVERY situation? The good, the bad, the ugly, easy or difficult?
God knows me! There is nowhere that I could go or situation that I could encounter that God is not there. He has created me. He knows all my days - past, present and future! Will I trust Him? Yes! Is it always easy? No, but the more I trust the easier it gets.
It all started with my son and football. My son has wanted to play football FOR years. My husband and I avoided the commitment FOR years...until this year. This year, my son's freshman year, was going to be the year that we would let him experience what it would be like to play football with a local school. My son spent the summer practicing, weightlifting, and building relationships with the team. Things were going well, I was going to watch my boy play! Then we missed a deadline on the paperwork and the possibility of him playing was called into question. I was disappointed and frustrated, he felt the same. I looked over at him and asked him, "If you can't play football this year, will you trust that this is God's plan for you, that He knows best?" He met my gaze and said, "Yes". We got in the needed paperwork. He got his pads and jersey. It looked like he was going to play after all. Another issue revolving around school zoning arose. There was no way around it. He will not be playing football this year. My son handled this disappointment with such grace and maturity. He is really, truly trusting God in this situation.
The weeks following this football story, it was my turn to answer the same question I had asked my son. God was whispering in my heart, asking me if I would trust His plan for my life, not just in the big things but in the everyday things. His question came in different situations:
Michelle, will you trust Me when your son is disappointed and there is nothing you can do to fix it?
Michelle, will you trust Me when your other son is hurt badly and an ER visit is necessary? Will you trust me to protect what is so valuable to you?
Michelle, will you trust Me when you have an extra wait time that cuts in to your schedule? Will you be joyful and at peace?
Michelle, will you trust Me when your day and plans are interrupted because one of your children has lice and your dryer breaks?
Michelle, will you trust Me when your equipment for your business is broken and customers are waiting? Will you trust that I alone am able to supply all your needs?
Michelle, will you trust Me in EVERY situation? The good, the bad, the ugly, easy or difficult?
O Lord, You have searched me and known me. 2 You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. 3 You comprehend my path and my lying down, And are acquainted with all my ways. 4 For there is not a word on my tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether. 5 You have hedged me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is high, I cannot attain it. 7 Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? 8 If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. 9 If I take the wings of the morning, And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, 10 Even there Your hand shall lead me, And Your right hand shall hold me. 11 If I say, "Surely the darkness shall fall on me," Even the night shall be light about me; 12 Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You, But the night shines as the day; The darkness and the light are both alike to You. 13 For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother's womb. 14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them. 17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! 18 If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand; When I awake, I am still with You.
~ Psalm 139: 1-18
God knows me! There is nowhere that I could go or situation that I could encounter that God is not there. He has created me. He knows all my days - past, present and future! Will I trust Him? Yes! Is it always easy? No, but the more I trust the easier it gets.
7.24.2012
THE Perfect Gift
On Saturday I celebrated my 37th birthday surrounded by some of my precious family. We ate food, took pictures, and played games. I received thoughtful and generous gifts. On Saturday evening we received a phone call that Steve, a friend from church, died in a motorcycle accident. It was sudden, it was unexpected, it hurts. One moment we are laughing, celebrating the next moment we are stunned, grieving.
Over the last couple of days I keep getting this picture in my head:
I see an army in marching order with a vacant spot. The marching is slow, sad feeling. I keep thinking this army is my church, the local body of believers that I worship with, the vacant spot is Steve's spot. We are hurting, wounded and one of our own is missing but we are still marching. Life does not stop to allow us to grieve so we move forward. We go to work, we cook dinner, we laugh, we make plans for the future but never far from our minds is the gap that Steve leaves or his precious family. Prayers are constantly on our hearts for peace and comfort for his wife, his children, his parents, his siblings, his friends, ourselves. Despite the pain,we find comfort and rejoice in the fact that although Steve is gone from this earth, from our midst, he is very much alive in our Father's house.
Steve is not in heaven because of his kindness, his humor or his willingness to help others. Those are things that we will miss. Steve is in heaven because he trusted Jesus' death on the cross as payment for his sins. "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life" John 3:16. The perfect gift that is offered to everyone. However, just like any gift, in order to possess it you must first receive it.
Death cannot be avoided on this earth but you can miss heaven, eternal life, by denying the gift that God is holding out to you. Don't wait!
Over the last couple of days I keep getting this picture in my head:
I see an army in marching order with a vacant spot. The marching is slow, sad feeling. I keep thinking this army is my church, the local body of believers that I worship with, the vacant spot is Steve's spot. We are hurting, wounded and one of our own is missing but we are still marching. Life does not stop to allow us to grieve so we move forward. We go to work, we cook dinner, we laugh, we make plans for the future but never far from our minds is the gap that Steve leaves or his precious family. Prayers are constantly on our hearts for peace and comfort for his wife, his children, his parents, his siblings, his friends, ourselves. Despite the pain,we find comfort and rejoice in the fact that although Steve is gone from this earth, from our midst, he is very much alive in our Father's house.
Steve is not in heaven because of his kindness, his humor or his willingness to help others. Those are things that we will miss. Steve is in heaven because he trusted Jesus' death on the cross as payment for his sins. "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life" John 3:16. The perfect gift that is offered to everyone. However, just like any gift, in order to possess it you must first receive it.
Death cannot be avoided on this earth but you can miss heaven, eternal life, by denying the gift that God is holding out to you. Don't wait!
7.13.2012
Human Sign Post
At the beginning of this month my pastor spoke about allegiance. Actually, the title of his message was, "I Pledge Allegiance". In his message he asked the question, "To whom or to what do you really pledge your allegiance?" He answered that question by saying that the goal of our allegiance should be our relationship with God.
"When you make a vow to the Lord your God, you shall not delay to pay it; for the Lord your God will surely require it of you , and it would be a sin to you. But if you abstain from vowing, it shall not be a sin to you. That which has gone from your lips you shall keep and perform, for you voluntarily vowed to the Lord your God what you have promised with your mouth." Deuteronomy 24:21-23
He shared that Godly allegiance includes proper priorities. Pastor went on to say that every area of your life will be affected by your relationship with Jesus. Then he said something that pierced my heart, he said the marriage relationship is a human sign post to our relationship with Christ. How we treat our spouse is how we treat God. Wow, maybe that's not true in your life but unfortunately it was true that Sunday morning in my life.
I'm so ashamed to admit I was slacking in pursuing my relationship with Christ, whom I have voluntarily verbally professed as my savior. I wasn't reading my Bible or praying except for the routine meal prayers. And yes, I was slacking in pursuing my relationship with my husband, to whom I had voluntarily vowed, before God and many witnesses, to love, honor and respect. I was just coasting through our relationship expecting him to love, honor and cherish me ignoring the promises I had made.
Wow, every time I read that paragraph above I just want to delete it and delete it again. It is so, so, so, so ugly!
Thankfully, the lesson doesn't end there. God loves me and you so much that he wants to expose the ugly in our lives, not to embarrass and humiliate us but to cleanse us and heal us. To make us better, more like Christ. The Bible says in 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." I confessed, He forgave.
Thankfully, my non-grudge holding husband was quick and willing to forgive me as well. Oh, sweet forgiveness!
"When you make a vow to the Lord your God, you shall not delay to pay it; for the Lord your God will surely require it of you , and it would be a sin to you. But if you abstain from vowing, it shall not be a sin to you. That which has gone from your lips you shall keep and perform, for you voluntarily vowed to the Lord your God what you have promised with your mouth." Deuteronomy 24:21-23
He shared that Godly allegiance includes proper priorities. Pastor went on to say that every area of your life will be affected by your relationship with Jesus. Then he said something that pierced my heart, he said the marriage relationship is a human sign post to our relationship with Christ. How we treat our spouse is how we treat God. Wow, maybe that's not true in your life but unfortunately it was true that Sunday morning in my life.
I'm so ashamed to admit I was slacking in pursuing my relationship with Christ, whom I have voluntarily verbally professed as my savior. I wasn't reading my Bible or praying except for the routine meal prayers. And yes, I was slacking in pursuing my relationship with my husband, to whom I had voluntarily vowed, before God and many witnesses, to love, honor and respect. I was just coasting through our relationship expecting him to love, honor and cherish me ignoring the promises I had made.
Wow, every time I read that paragraph above I just want to delete it and delete it again. It is so, so, so, so ugly!
Thankfully, the lesson doesn't end there. God loves me and you so much that he wants to expose the ugly in our lives, not to embarrass and humiliate us but to cleanse us and heal us. To make us better, more like Christ. The Bible says in 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." I confessed, He forgave.
Thankfully, my non-grudge holding husband was quick and willing to forgive me as well. Oh, sweet forgiveness!
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| Wild flowers my hubby picked for me! |
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